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Fiction. Feminism. Fat Girls. · Aug 7, 2026

But Daddy, He Reads Romance & Eats Puss

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A definitive guide to the best T.V. boyfriends/husbands, plus what kind of romance novels each of them would read

I collect fictional boyfriends like Pokémon. And as any collector would tell you, they come in all shapes and sizes, some more evolved than the others.

There’s the broody rake desperate for a wife. Or, how about that morally gray biker with a checkered past? Some of them take you by surprise, like the Scottish Highlander who’s somehow understands feminism better than most twenty-first century men. And let’s not forget all the shadow daddies out there, lurking in the crevices of time.

Needless to say, I’ve caught quite a few over the years.

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While romance novels have given me some truly elite book boyfriends, television deserves a little credit, too. Some of my all-time favorite fictional men don’t live between the pages, but on the small screen.

And I’m not talking about the dudes whose entire brand of comedy is weaponized incompetence or “I hate my spouse” jokes, but rather the lovable, imperfect goofs who time over time, have proven to be wildly devoted to the people they love.

They communicate.
They support their partners.
They actually seem to like their wives and girlfriends. Novel, I know.

The bar may be in hell, but these guys showed up with a ladder.

These fictional men have ruined me—in the best possible way—so today, I’m sharing them with you, along with a few book recommendations. Because, to quote Alanis Morissette, “You Oughta Know” that every single one of these men would read romance novels.

And eat puss.
And probably, beg for seconds.


Fiction. Feminism. Fat Girls. is a biweekly newsletter written by plus-size romance author, Kelly Reynolds. To receive new posts, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber!


Gomez Addams, The Addams Family

Toxic masculinity, who? If there were ever a patron saint of “I’m down bad for my spouse,” it would be Gomez Addams.

Even decades into their marriage, he’s still unapologetically obsessed with Morticia—how hot is that? He flirts endlessly, celebrates every eccentric thing about her, and never once tries to dim her weirdness. If anything, he loves her more because of it.

P.S. if you’re in the Portland, Oregon area and looking for a Morticia-approved coffee shop, check out my latest Cold Brew, Hot Smut.

Gomez is a reminder that romance doesn’t disappear once the happily ever after begins. Grand gestures can be great, but it’s the daily adoration and genuine delight he takes in his wife that make him one of television’s greatest husbands.

What’s he reading? Whatever the fuck Morticia is reading. There isn’t a doubt in my mind that these two are acting out every dirty detail from the books they read. Starting with Light as a Feather by Alexia Onyx.

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Mike Hannigan, Friends

Women love a goofball, and Phoebe’s blind-date turned husband, Mike, is proof that goofy guys don’t need to be the loudest person in the room.

While everyone else on Friends seems to thrive on chaos, Mike quietly became exactly what Phoebe needed—someone who accepted every wonderfully weird part of her without trying to change a thing. Are you noticing a pattern with my picks?

Mike—also affectionately known as Crap Bag—is emotionally mature, and never embarrassed by Phoebe’s quirks. Whether he’s playing air piano to support her dreams or navigating their unconventional relationship with kindness and humor, Mike shows that steady doesn’t have to mean boring.

What’s he reading? Don’t ask me to explain why, but this man is reading historical romance. He is subscribing to Beverly Jenkins’ newsletter and attending meet and greets with Julia Quinn. His latest read? The Devil of Downtown by Joanna Shupe.

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Jerry ‘Smith’ Jerrod, Sex and the City

I still haven’t forgiven Darren Star for what he did to the Sex and the City characters in that god-awful reboot, but I can almost get past it because of Smith Jerrod.

Smith could have easily been written as the “hot, younger boy toy,” especially in the early 2000s when shows like Desperate Housewives were doing just that. Instead, he ended up becoming half of one of the healthiest relationships in the entire Sex and the City universe.

Smith is confident enough that he never feels threatened by Samantha’s strength, and that’s exactly what makes him so attractive.

He loves her without trying to tame her ambition or independence, supports her career, and most notably, stands beside her through her breast cancer treatment.

What he’s reading? Besides working his way through The Kama Sutra, Smith is for sure an avid erotica reader, as is Samantha. She’s for sure reading a book aloud to him while he goes down on her. When it comes to erotica, there’s no better collection than the annual Best Women’s Erotica of the Year. I recommend starting with Volume 6.

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Phil Dunphy, Modern Family

As someone who almost exclusively writes cinnadom golden retrievers, Phil Dunphy might as well be the blueprint.

He’s endlessly optimistic, genuinely kind—except if you threaten his family in any way—and somehow manages to approach marriage with the same excitement most people reserve for the honeymoon phase.

And so what if he occasionally says the wrong thing? He loves Claire wholeheartedly and never lets life’s responsibilities squeeze the joy out of their relationship, and that’s no easy feat with three kids.

What he’s reading? Phil is going to “accidentally” get into reading romance when one of his daughters leaves her copy of A Touch of Darkness by Scarlett St. Clair in the bathroom. Not only will he devour it in one sitting, but he’ll go on to share every sordid detail with every person he comes across at the grocery store.

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Ben Wyatt, Parks and Recreation

Ben Wyatt might look like your typical insecure, manosphere podcast bro, but looks can be deceiving. Rather than compete with Leslie Knope’s ambition, Ben becomes her biggest fan.

He’s all about showing his love, whether that means building his partner a tiny model of Pawnee, cheering her on whenever her doubts creep in, or obsessing over the tiniest details in his marriage proposal.

Ben is proof that emotional intelligence and a healthy appreciation for nerdiness are an elite combination. He’s the perfect example of marrying your best friend.

What he’s reading? I kind of feel like Ben would enjoy some cowboy romance books like Jessica Peterson’s Lucky River Ranch series. Not because he aspires to be a cowboy, but because it’s so far from who he is, he can fully appreciate the fantasy. I have no doubt that Ron Swanson will have some book recommendations for him.

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Jake Peralta, Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Hear me out… Jake might start the series as an overgrown kid who’d rather quote Die Hard than have a serious conversation.

But one of the best parts of Brooklyn Nine-Nine is watching him grow into a genuinely incredible partner for Amy Santiago without ever losing the goofy charm that made her fall for him in the first place.

Jake learns how to compromise and put his family first, all while cheering Amy on every step of her career. He never asks her to shrink herself, but instead, delights in her brilliance, proving that growing up doesn’t mean growing out of who you are.

What he’s reading? Mirroring his own life, Jake loves a slow-burn plot where two rivals trash-talk each other until they finally snap and have hate-sex in an alley. And if there’s happen to be a chase scene or two? Even better. He’s going to love Under the Rose by Kathryn Nolan.

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More than anything, what these six have in common is the rarest combination on television: they treat their partners like the main characters of their own lives, not supporting roles in someone else’s.

In a moment when misogyny is getting louder and more shameless by the day, it’s almost radical to watch men who don’t compete with a woman’s ambition or demand she make herself smaller so they can feel bigger.

That’s why they’ve earned permanent spots in my Pokédex.

My upcoming romance novella, Serving Bunt, available in September.

And that’s why I always come back to men like these when I sit down to write my romance heroes. Sweet, caring cinnamon rolls with surprising hobbies—including romance reading—who will cuddle the shit out of you one minute, and drill you into the mattress the next.

Or, you can do the drilling. My boys are equal pegging opportunists.

So if your standards for fictional husbands and boyfriends just got a little higher, you’re welcome. May the real ones start taking notes.

Be feral. Stay dangerous.
xo

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