Don’t put your feelings…

A few months ago, I read another writer’s article on receiving rejections. Her take was to stop being another writer complaining about your rejections and just get on with your writing.

But it bugged me. Because while I saw her valid point, I disagreed.

I’ve had to learn how to process a lot of trauma - a long, exhausting but well worthwhile thing to go through - and I had to learn how to feel everything. Every little uncomfortable emotional twinge needs to be felt. Otherwise, those twinges add-up, bubble-up, and voila: trouble.

So as a writer, I know rejection is just part of the game. But I feel each and every one. Some hurt a lot more than others. So I let myself sit with that before I move on; I sit with it in order to move on.

I go through all of what the rejection brings up, such as:

• Oh, the disappointment.

• I didn’t even realize how badly I wanted this one…

• Wait… Does my idea just suck?

Once I sift through all of those thoughts and come up from the hurt with some insight, then I can really move on, with things like:

• It’s still a good idea.

• Yes, it’s disappointing, but at least you tried…

• And now you can submit the pitch elsewhere; and try, try, try again.

So when it comes to rejections, I think it’s a good, productive thing to take a beat and feel your real feelings.

DO NOT: suck it up, Buttercup.

It kind of feels like working out when you’re not in the mood; you might not want to at first, but you’ll never regret it.

For Insider, I wrote about struggling to pay for new teenager things in this economy. And on the Arrogant Baker blog, I created 7 DIY Chic Halloween costume ideas, including Elaine (from Seinfeld) and Lisa Simpson.

Reading: I’m reading Bud, Not Buddy - my son’s first required reading book this school year. I started doing this when he was in third grade and had to read Charlotte’s Web. Not only is it a great way to connect with my son - as it gives me something to talk to him about - but I feel like I get some valuable lessons that I missed out on at his age.

Watching: I’ve been rewatching Two Broke Girls and getting cozy with the corny sitcom and broke “girl boss” nostalgia. Plus, you can enjoy Jennifer Coolidge in rare form, pre-White Lotus glow-up.

Listening: I’ve been listening to Olivia Rodrigo’s GUTS album after listening to Vampire on loop. It’s youthful, healing, and refreshingly feminist.

Writing Class Radio wants you to write about your political turning point - the moments you decided you believed in XYZ. What a prompt!! Here’s the full deets:

“I want YOUR story about the moment or ongoing situation that made you who you are politically.

Did the Cuban government confiscate your family’s business? Did you or anyone you love survive the Holocaust? Did you need an abortion and get denied? Write about how that experience shaped you. Please send your story (1,000 words) from anywhere in the world to andrea@writingclassradio.com. Send as a Word doc or in the body of an email.” Deadline: November 15, 2025.

Write on,

Ashley