Oddball Thoughts

As we wind up the first month of 2026, I offer you some motley this and that to make you smile, wonder, and/or roll your eyes:

⭒ If you sleep like a baby, does that mean you wake up every two or three hours to poop in your pants?

⭒ Would you rather be able to reverse one decision you make every day or have the ability to stop time for ten seconds every day?

⭒ If you’re feeling antsy, call an exterminator.

⭒ Stay out of hot water when brewing a pun. It’s best to use subtle tea.

⭒ Suppose you have cancer, and surgery would cure you. But you also have a heart condition that only gives you a 10% chance of surviving surgery. Would you take a chance on that cancer-curing surgery or opt to spend another year alive?

⭒ There may be things in life you don’t like, but that’s not a reason to stop liking life.

⭒ Wouldn’t it be sweet if, after making a left turn too swiftly and hearing your groceries waddle out of their bags in your trunk, you heard them giggle as they gathered quickly back into their bags at the next right turn?

⭒ Treat all people as you would a newborn, with tenderness, awe, and a smile on your face.

⭒ Thyme weights four know won.

⭒ Why do people talk about having butter fingers but not about having margarine toes?

⭒It’s as hot as tamales, but I’m as jolly as ranchers because there’s no reason to be a sour patch when God is good and I have plenty. (I thought of this one last summer.)

⭒ “A watched pot never boils,” but a washed pot always soils.

⭒ “Beggars can’t be choosers,” but boogers can be doozers.

⭒Lastly, think of ten things you would like to do before January ends. Complete one of them. Then comment below and tell me what you did. 😊 (or comment on any of the above!)

“Be who you is and not who you ain’t. Because if you ain’t who you is, then you is who you ain’t. And that ain’t good.” — Deep South Proverb

Wishing all of you good fellas (and gals) outlandish, Joe Pesci-type thoughts,

Annmarie