WE HAVE THE DIOR COUTURE EARRINGS AT HOME

Yesterday evening, while having a shower, my mind wandered back to the thing that had been occupying my thoughts for the last two days: the twin bunches of cyclamen that hung from the lobes of the majority of the models on the catwalk at Jonathan Anderson’s Dior couture debut. As i glanced up at my shower loofah, prominently placed next to the best shampoo and conditioner i have ever used, it occured to me that this lowly shower loofah was the poor man’s (my) Dior couture cyclamen earrings. Or at least it could be.

I had to rush off to the upper east side to visit a friend’s gallery before dinner, so had to hold back from attempting to craft the couture in that very moment, but this morning i dove back into Dior head first.

Initially i thought it would be best if i had a second loofah so each loofah could be its own earring, so i wandered down to my local CVS and perused the shelves. To my chagrin the offerings were not the same hue as my imported loofah (originally hailing from England. Bizarrely purchased at the Gatwick airport Boots while i was en route to Sicily a couple of years ago. What a life this loofah has already lived!)

Here is a tutorial on how to turn the one loofah into two couture earrings. Not quite the Feeding of the 5000, more a miracle adjacent feat of the sartorial variety.

Excuse my baritone, i am slightly congested.

I have decided that i will indeed wear these earrings out this evening, i must admit that i shall be further securing them with some thread as it would be particularly embarrassing to have them unravel on the subway at rush hour. Though they do look quite marvelous unraveled, as i showcase in the tutorial. Perhaps i should acquire some more loofahs and make a whole look.

maybe shower dressing is the new power dressing?

The thought has occurred to me that i am absolutely never to wear them out in the rain because they would get so heavy they would almost certainly fall off. That could make for quite the cautionary tale.