Joy of Opting Out (JOOO)

I was reading Janeen Ippolito’s recent newsletter, and she talked about the term JOMO (Joy of Missing Out) as an alternative to FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). She’s an amazing author coach and I love her quirky newsletters. While I understood what she was getting at, the “Missing Out” part really bothered me because it’s FOMO’s big driver.

Joy of Opting Out

‘Opting Out’ shows you aren’t victim to circumstances. Instead, you made a choice.

The last few years, I had big deadlines looming and kept thinking I couldn’t take a break for the things I enjoyed. Short term, denying myself the things I enjoy is ok. But it’s not sustainable long term. I feared missing out on the best timing, having the best book launch, and you name it. Going 100 mph every day was going to break me, yet I still wanted to do ALL THE THINGS and volunteered in several areas.

That was so dumb! (Yes, I dare say this about myself—as I can see the havoc it wreaked and am learning to steer clear of it.) The constant push to get things done for my books, be involved with other authors daily, and volunteer for activities didn’t honor my introvert need for down time to recover.

Finally, I bought a clue and took time to knit in the evenings by designing and starting my ‘We Beelieve in You’ afghan1. It was my lifeline after a stressful day and if I didn’t get to knit, I was unbearable to be around. This really brought home how badly I needed time to step away.

I found that I also needed to say ‘No’ to more things, simplify others, and only focus on a few really important tasks at a time.

It’s helped. I’m still recovering. But there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. I want to write again—not just short stories, but the 3rd book in my Liminal Chronicles urban fantasy series.

Do you, too, need a way to provide your own boundaries? If so, I offer you the ‘Joy of Opting Out’. Make your choices. Set your boundaries. Give yourself room to breathe.

Remember to…

All the best,

Amy