Joy Joy Joy

Maybe it’s that after two years of suffering from Chronic Fatigue brought on by Long Covid, I finally have almost a full year of health under me, thanks to the Vanderbilt Neurology Sleep Disorder Center and them proscribing a med that works. Maybe I’m finally on the other side of “wishing things were different” post-divorce. Maybe I’m finally on the other side of all the trauma work I’ve done in the past 5 years. People say I look younger, that there’s a glow about me, a difference in my eyes and they’re right. There’s something different. It’s like my inner self woke up, looked around, and said, ‘enough sleeping and being sad, f that s. Life is good the way it is.’ And so it is. Maybe it’s getting to 57 years old. Whatever it is, I’ll take it. This is truly my first fully joyful, fully awake, fully not-grieving holiday in a long time. And I’m making the most of it. I hit the 50% off sales this week, garlanded the shite out of my house with twinkling lights, wrapped my new porch with garlands and big OG lights.

Yesterday I made batches of Christmas cookies from faded, stained recipe cards my mother gave me years ago. I have one kid and I live alone 1/2 time with him. I don’t need those cookies. But I do. I made my first ex husband’s mother’s (my 1st Ex Mother In Law) marinara sauce she taught me 25 years ago. Her family was from Parma, Italy and I’ve never tasted red sauce like hers anywhere in the world. That and the dog are the only things I took from the marriage. Besides a cherished long, deep friendship with my ex and his wife. I make that sauce in batches for presents and to freeze. It’s my choice for Last Meal. Kal’s mother’s sauce with sweet Italian sausages with bread from Antique Bakery on Willow Avenue (gone now) in Hoboken over linguini. The secret is the San Marzano tomatoes. We don’t skimp in my house.

I’m done teaching at Cumberland University this term and won’t return until Fall 2026. Taking next term off to concentrate on writing and recording with my new project, Salt + The Wound, a duo with Kenny Foster. We’re both very excited about this work. Great songs. Great friend. Can’t wait for you to hear what we’re cooking up. Also, I’ll be doing shows every other weekend through 2026. Pretty much booked up through the beginning of the summer. Then the poetry book comes out in September 2026 and I’ll be doing a book tour in the Fall 2026. It’s the first time I’ve really had the year mapped out so cleanly. It gives me a peace and a sense of ease. I know what I’m doing. I’m writing. I’m right now working the next record and will be throughout 2026. 2027 will be the duo record. And writing the follow up book to The Cardinals. And watching Huck turn over another year. I’m usually not good at the long term vision. I do much better with what’s right in front of me. But it’s nice to know there’s a map, so I can just take in each day right now.

Back to the sauce. It needs stirring. I won’t give the recipe away. But I’ll give you a jar of the sauce.

xo
A