The Ides of February

Dear Readers:

First, this. I am “pausing” subscription payments until February 28th — and possibly beyond that — because I have not published any essays since January 18th. My goal — and my promise to you — is to publish a weekly newsletter.

If a newsletter does not arrive, you should not be charged for it.

And now, THIS:

In our family, if you’re going to die, you’re going to do it in February.

Our most recent funeral was a week ago, when we laid to rest a beloved family member — our cousin, Nancy.

Our February funerals are so frequent that we more or less have a standing arrangement with our minister at the Freeville United Methodist Church.

All of these occasions are very sad, but last week’s loss was particularly tough. Witnessing a person’s suffering pulls such contrasting feelings and emotions through the witness’s body and heart.

Because you don’t want anything to end.

And yet you do. You really and truly do want it to end.

For the past eight weeks or so, my sisters and cousins have been providing constant in-home care for our ill cousin, whose partner of 40 years unfortunately has dementia.

Today was my break in the care-rota, and so I put on my favorite hat and a few sweaters and luxuriated in the cold. The temperature was -4, with a wind-chill of -27.

Below, my commute:

I took myself on a little waterfall tour, and I found lots of ice and plenty of metaphors.

Can spring be far behind?

No matter how frozen-over the world seems right now, there IS life roaring beneath.

Bonus: Main Street, Freeville on a Friday night:

Love,

Amy