Is it okay to be a slow creator?

I write 300-500 words a day, not everyday. Maybe 4 days a week, sometimes less, last week I didn’t write at all. I am a full time writer!

My books creep forward. That makes them sound spooky. What’s a sweeter word - My creations tiptoe forward. And then eventually a whole ass book will tap me on the shoulder and say, hey, I am done! And I will look at it and think, where the hell did you come from? Who the fuck wrote you?

I trust my own pace. I trust my pace because over the years, I have seen that books get written, art gets made, essays get sent out. But if I was to judge myself on a day to day basis, it would be very easy to be concerned. It would feel like nothing gets done. It would feel slow and disconnected and NOT OPTIMISED.

I am someone who gets off on the feeling of momentum. I hate to feel stagnant. It is such an icky feeling to me. Mostly because I just prefer the feeling of creation over the feeling not creating. But again, slowly, over time, I am learning that slow creation (and entire breaks from creation) does not equal stagnation. I am a creator, I am momentum incarnate. When I am not actively making things, or making things very slowly, my brain is still concocting connections, ideas, moments that will eventually be integrated into my art. Magic and movement is always happening even when I cannot see it. To be an artist is to actively participate in your life.

However, we are living in a culture where speed is everything. Optimisation is king. You must produce, and produce quick. You must have work flows and rigid routines, and performance protocols. You must constantly feel like momentum is building! You should be always growing. And creators are not exempt from these rules. In fact, because you are doing something as audacious as MAKE ART you must be faster and more prolific than the rest, to prove to society you deserve to be an artist.

fuck that

If we want to create art sustainably and joyfully we must learn to listen to our own rhythms, and our rhythms will frequently be slow, syncopated and always undulating. The creative journey is a vulnerable, human, holy process that rejects optimisation because it is not a process of production. It is a process of becoming. Which, in my opinion, is totally different. We are not trying to fill a gap in the market, we are trying to fill a hole in someones’s soul. It requires a different work flow.

Whenever I say this publicly, I am met with a mixed response of relief, gratitude and this specific comment written in slightly different ways:

I get an inundation of creatives equating their pace of creation with the fluctuations of their income.

So can the professional artist create slowly?

Battling an algorithm that wants constant content whilst also living in late stage capitalism which wants you to be an art machine is very hard. I am not gaslighting us, this is a shit show, I am so proud of us for navigating a world that does not want us to sucseed.

However, I don’t think that the pace of your creation is directly equated to the pace of your income. I think capitalism would have you believe that the more you create the more money you make, we are taught that hustle and hard work will always equal monetary reward right?! But this system is fucking cooked and stupid and ‘hard work’ or ‘high output’ does not automatically mean financial reward. Some of the most prolific creators I know do not make any money with their art, and some of the most considered, slow creators I know make an abundant income.

In fact, I would argue that my low word count protects my income rather than makes it worse. I would argue that an artist must have a sustainable creative practice in order to get their creations finished and in their patrons hands. If we want long creative careers, we must have practices that can be sustained for a long time! If we want a creative practice that supports us financially for a long time, we need to be able to create for a long time.

So if pace does not impact income, what does impact my income?

Great question, definitely enough scope here for another essay. But I would say a back log of creations that have been made sustainably over the last decade are a huge part of my financial stability. I would say that the past decade of developing long term trust and relationships with my 1000 true fans contributes massively to my income. I would say that taking a lot of time to develop ideas that are very vulnerable to me helps my income.

I have never had a big break. My professional life has formed slowly, tiny step by tiny step. And whilst sometimes I would really love a massive moment where loads of cash and attention comes my way, I truly think this slow way of building my life of art has been the most wonderful, sustainable way to do it.

Nothing is wrong because progress is slow. Honour your pace of creation.

Art will be made. And that is all that matters.

Amie.

P.S. I am running two masterclasses for my creative community The Inspired Collective on the 22nd of august, and if you become (or already are) a paid subscriber between now and the 22nd of August, you are invited! One masterclass will be on being a creator on social media and the other is on running a business as an artist. 90 minutes each, they’re deep dive, practical conversations I wish someone had had with me earlier.