We are told to love our enemies. This does not mean we condone what they do. However, we must forgive them and hand them over to God so we can move on in a healthy way. Knowing what love truly is by knowing God, it is amazing how life can change when we forgive.
It’s hard to forgive someone who hurt us. Our human nature wants to make sure they find their comeuppance for their actions. We want to make sure others know how bad the person is. This does not help anyone, and adds festering to the wound the other caused. It makes us angry and bitter, which leads to stress on your body. It also disconnects us from God. We are not to offer anything to God if we are still holding something against another. He will not forgive us if we are not forgiving.
Forgiveness frees us from a bitter cycle that leads to hate. Many times we go separate ways after deeper disagreements with someone. They aren’t in our life anymore, but they might as well be right next to us if we continue spewing negativity about them. We are only hurting ourselves by not letting go. It will poison all our relationships, lead to health issues, and destroy our peace. All the while, that person is off living their life and nothing you are doing is bothering them.
God claims vengeance is his. Once we forgive, we can let God handle it. After all, he knows everything the other person has done and where their heart is with God. He also knows if that person will turn to him if they haven’t yet. Who knows, they might turn to God because we forgave them and remained pleasant when we wind up in their presence again. The Bible tells us when we show love to our enemies and they do something bad to us; it heaps hot coals on their heads. Let them dig their hole with God, while you move on to live as he wants you to.
Now we have to make sure we aren’t putting ourselves in harm’s way. Don’t stay around a person who has hurt you and could do so again. Report them to the police if they broke the law in what they did. Get the help you need to remain safe. Once safe, let God heal you and teach you how to forgive.
Once I understood God’s love, I could forgive. I was bullied all the way through high school and even felt like it continued in the military. This led me to not being that great of a person in my twenties in that I was pretty blunt and didn’t let people in easily. So I also learned how to apologize to people I knew I hurt and I did not do it for their forgiveness. I’ve been told by someone they did not want my forgiveness. How they respond is up to them. My part was to act like I knew God’s love and offer the forgiveness and apologies where I needed to.
It’s time to decide if you want to feel the freedom God promises by knowing his love and learning how to forgive. Know that it is a process and not instantaneous. Our feelings don’t turn on and off like a switch, but we can learn how to change them. Your forgiveness frees you and your ‘enemy’ from the spiral of hate and allows God to work in both of your lives.
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