Most men only have two settings when a conversation gets hot.
You either keep the peace, where you swallow what you actually think and let the moment slide right past you, or you go to war, where you dig in and try to win, and somewhere in there the other person stops being a person and starts being a position you have to beat.
I used to think those were the only two doors in the room. Fold or fight. Disappear or dominate.
They aren’t.
In the new video I walk through a third way, the one that sits in between nodding along and declaring war, where you get to stay in the room, stay honest, and still let the other guy keep his footing. These aren’t theories I came up with on a whim. They’re practices, the kind that hold up when you actually use them on a Tuesday with someone you love and disagree with.
I broke the whole thing down in the article, with the moves you can use the next time you feel yourself reaching for one of those two old settings.
Read it here: https://alliedwecan.substack.com/p/how-to-disagree-without-disappearing
What’s your default when it gets tense, fold or fight? Read the piece and tell me which setting you’re trying to break.
Comments
Nothing yet. Say the first thing.
Sign in to join the conversation.