This week, I came across The New York Times summer reading bucket list. It is filled with thoughtful ideas to expand our reading horizons, from finally picking up something you have been meaning to read for years, to borrowing a book from the library (bonus points if it is a librarian recommendation), to exploring a genre that is not your typical go-to.
It got me thinking about a bucket list in the realm of etiquette and kindness, too.
As we settle into a season that hopefully brings a little more breathing room and feels a little less hectic, here are some ideas you might consider.
☀️ Summer of Kindness Bucket List
Read a book that offers a perspective very different from your own, and grow in compassion
Invite someone for a walk, smoothie, or ice cream
Learn the name of someone you regularly see but do not know well yet
Send a handwritten note just because
Do not gatekeep your favorites. Share your favorite local ice cream flavor, recipe, restaurant, beach read, walking trail, bookstore, or farmers market find
Ask someone to share a favorite memory of someone they have lost, and really listen
Reconnect with an old friend or mentor you have not spoken to in a while
Offer help before someone has to ask
Thank someone whose kindness often goes unnoticed
Send a postcard while traveling
Leave an encouraging comment on someone’s work, creativity, or small business
Put together a beautiful meal or table simply because people are worth celebrating
Thank someone working outside in the summer heat
Offer to take a group photo for the family you see struggling with a selfie
Invite someone who might otherwise be alone to join you
Bring flowers, fruit, or another seasonal treat when visiting someone’s home
Introduce two people who might enjoy knowing one another
Put your phone away during a sunset, meal, or gathering with people you love
Bring extra patience to airports, road trips, and crowded summer places
End summer having made people feel more welcomed, included, and appreciated because you were there
I recently joined Washington, DC’s Fox5 live to share about my book, Was It Something I Said? and business etiquette tips for new grads looking to make a strong first impression.
You can also get caught up on my Ask Alison column in Evie Magazine here.
Q: We just received a wedding invitation for an acquaintance’s daughter. We have not kept in touch with the family since they moved out of the country about 8 years ago beyond occasionally seeing social media updates. We won’t be able to attend, but should we still send a gift?
A: In most situations, you still want to send a gift when you are invited to a wedding, even if you are unable to attend. Being invited to a wedding is a tremendous honor and people generally do not extend wedding invitations lightly.
That said, an invitation does not obligate you to send something, and you should never feel pressure to spend beyond your means. It is not about the cost.
The one exception might be if the invitation feels genuinely unusual to you. If you have no meaningful relationship with the couple and feel awkward or confused about being included, you may decide differently.
But the general standard is that if someone includes you in such an important milestone, etiquette typically leans toward finding a way to celebrate the occasion, whether through a gift, a thoughtful card, or both.
If you have a question for a future Answering for a Friend segment or my Ask Alison column, please email info@elevateetiquette.com.
For more writing like this, my modern etiquette guide, Was it Something I Said?, is on sale wherever books are sold.
With love,
Alison
Comments
Nothing yet. Say the first thing.
Sign in to join the conversation.