Mullets, Irony and L’esprit de L’escalier

A few months ago, I was walking with Sarah and our son in Brooklyn. (I include the location because where else should a discussion of irony begin but in the fourth-largest city in America. A man donning a truly spectacular mullet walked past. I asked my dear companions whether mullets are always ironic. My sincere question was met with utter disdain. The conversation that followed reminded me of the classic scene from The Princess Bride in which Vizzini is accused of not knowing the meaning of the word inconceivable, a word he uses constantly.

Later the same day, we passed a duet featuring a guitar and a tuba. I asked if a tuba, featured in anything other than a marching band, brass band, or orchestra is always ironic. My companions acted as if they didn’t even hear.

I think of irony as a word whose meaning most people know, though many would be hard-pressed to define. This fact was used for laughs in a great scene from Reality Bites (which, along with The Replacement’s Bastards of Young, is a Generation X-defining work of art).

The nice people at Merriam-Webster define irony as:

a contrast between expectation and reality. It occurs when the literal meaning of words or the actual outcome of a situation is the exact opposite of what you would normally expect.

There are a few types of irony. I overuse verbal irony. This is when you make a statement that is the opposite of what you mean. Right now, I am sitting outside typing. It is swamp-like. If someone asked how I was doing, I’d probably mop my sweaty brow and respond, “a perfect day to sit outside in the sun typing.”

Situational irony was best articulated in Alanis Morissette’s song, Ironic.

A traffic jam when you’re already late
A “No Smoking” sign on your cigarette break
It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It’s meeting the man of my dreams, and then meeting his beautiful wife

Ok, maybe these are not quite as good as I’d hoped. The internet suggests a fire station burning down or a marriage counselor filing for divorce as a great example of situational irony, where the outcome is the opposite of what you expect.

I think of dramatic irony usually happening when the audience knows something important that a character does not, and the situation is played for laughs, suspense, or meaning. My favorite example is in Lamb to the Slaughter. I first saw this as an Alfred Hitcock Presents episode, but it was actually originally a 1953 Roald Dahl short story. A wife kills her husband with a frozen leg of lamb. In the end, she offers the investigating detectives a lamb dinner.

None of us is fast enough with comebacks. Who doesn’t wish that Aaron Sorkin could write dialogue for you in advance? So often, hours or days later, you say to yourself, “Ugh, that’s what I should have said.” The term for this is l’esprit de l’escalier, stairway wit. You leave the party at which you were humiliated and, walking down the stairs to the exit, you think of the perfect retort.

A mullet is a strong decision. It is making the statement: I got this extreme haircut because it looks cool. But we all know mullets are not cool. Hence, the irony. The mullet is working to look cool, while the understanding is that it is not.

Tubas are key to marching bands. They add welcome drama and bass to bands and orchestras. They also look ridiculous, in the most charming of ways. If you want to go out into Prospect Park and play your flute, that is nice. If you’re good, people will probably appreciate it. You might even make some money, though less than when people had cash or change in their pockets.

If you ask your tuba-playing friend to join you, you’re being ironic.

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Photo Credit: Hitomi Bremmer