i wanted to be someone who could reach people

say the exact thing

that made something click for them

that made them feel seen

clear

lit up

because i know what it feels like to be missed

i think part of me believed

if i could unlock something in others

i wouldn’t have to feel that ache anymore

i think what i really wanted

was to feel understood

i’m starting to see

you can’t get the feeling you want by trying to create it in someone else

so when i reach out

hoping they’ll change how i feel

that’s my cue

to come back to myself

to stop looking outward for a feeling

i’m being asked to hold