# The Accidental Career Girl Humorous personal essays by a woman who learned to pivot long before the world started spinning. Page: Feed: --- ## [For Mom](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/for-mom) _2026-02-23 · Ilene_ Yesterday marked the shloshim, or the thirtieth day, since my mother’s burial. ## [My thoughts on being a childless cat lady](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/my-thoughts-on-being-a-childless) _2024-09-20 · Ilene_ I started writing this story as part of my book of essays four years ago. ## [Join my new subscriber chat](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/join-my-new-subscriber-chat) _2024-08-29 · Ilene_ A private space for us to converse and connect ## [Time to Heal](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/time-to-heal) _2024-07-02 · Ilene_ Why I wrote this story ## [The Necklace](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/the-necklace) _2024-02-13 · Ilene_ I pulled the twisted gold chain out of the inlaid wood jewelry box and watched as the intricate charm that has dangled from it for at least 70 years spun around. ## [The Lemon](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/the-lemon) _2024-01-02 · Ilene_ As many of you know, I lost my dog Clooney right before the holidays. ## [Little People](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/little-people) _2023-10-05 · Ilene_ It's been awhile since I've posted. ## [My Willy Wonka Moment](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/my-willy-wonka-moment) _2023-06-12 · Ilene_ I wrote the story below for my memoir writing class after we were asked to recall a moment for which no photograph exists. ## [Join me on Notes](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/join-me-on-notes) _2023-05-03 · Ilene_ A new place for us to share ideas ## [Does the Met Matter?](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/does-the-met-matter) _2023-05-02 · Ilene_ By now, you have probably all seen the extensive coverage of the Met Gala red carpet. ## [Sync bookmarks across every browser (Sponsored)](https://crawlproof.com/a/uo1JWWovULf6) _2023-05-02 · **Sponsored**_ Two-way sync across Chrome, Firefox and Safari; built-in ad and tracker blocker. ## [The Met Gala: A Preview](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/the-met-gala-a-preview) _2023-05-01 · Ilene_ Ever heard of it? Tonight's the night ## [When in a Pandemic, Call Paul](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/when-in-a-pandemic-call-paul) _2023-04-10 · Ilene_ No one would have ever expected the five of us to fall in love with the same man. ## [Why Passover is My Favorite Holiday](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/why-passover-is-my-favorite-holiday) _2023-04-04 · Ilene_ Passover brings back so many fond -- and crazy -- memories ## [Bard vs. Chatbot GPT](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/bard-vs-chatbot-gpt) _2023-03-31 · Ilene_ Who wore it better? ## [My first published essay...](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/my-first-published-essay) _2023-03-14 · Ilene_ Is here! Thank you, Kveller. ## [Oscars so right](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/oscars-so-right) _2023-03-13 · Ilene_ A wrap-up of 2023's red/champagne carpet ## [Does This Make Sense to You?](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/does-this-make-sense-to-you) _2023-03-02 · Ilene_ Some musings on song lyrics ## [Is George Clooney to Blame?](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/is-george-clooney-to-blame) _2023-02-27 · Ilene_ By Ilene V. Smith ## [Beach People](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/beach-people) _2023-01-26 · Ilene_ by Ilene V. Smith ## [CLI-first decentralized compute (Sponsored)](https://crawlproof.com/a/qCNCwsH49DKE) _2023-01-26 · **Sponsored**_ Run and pay spare GPUs from the CLI — transcode, coinpay (DID+escrow), infernet (AI). ## [Weight Watchers: How I Lost Weight and Gained a Best Friend](https://accidentalcareergirl.substack.com/p/weight-watchers-how-i-lost-weight) _2023-01-16 · Ilene_ We each grabbed a handle of one of the large wooden double doors to the Bellmore Jewish Center at the same time.