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Absurdly Rational · Aug 24, 2025

The German grifter who proved RFK Jr. wrong.

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Absurdly Rational · Absurdly Rational

On May 27, 2025, RFK Jr. stood shoulder-to-shoulder with two of his ideologically-aligned lieutenants: Jay Bhattacharya and Marty Makary -in order to make Kennedy’s announcement sound almost science-like, instead of arbitrary and authoritarian, stating:

I couldn't be more pleased to announce that as of today the COVID vaccine for healthy children and healthy pregnant women has been removed from the CDC recommended immunization schedule,"

FDA chief Dr. Makary chimed in: "There's no evidence healthy kids need it today and most countries have stopped recommending it for children."

There is some truth to these statements, but the truth begins and ends with RFK Jr. being pleased to state them.

The non-truths are numerous and unhinged. You can only say that there is no evidence for these things if you simultaneously ignore all of the evidence to the contrary, like:

  • Severe covid infections lead to a unique syndrome in children called MIS-C that occasionally requires being put on a heart and lung machine (which is kind of a big deal even in the ICU), and it is over 22 times more likely to occur in unvaccinated kids. While ECMO is life-saving, I dare you to look at this photo and tell me you would rather have your child go through this in favor of a tiny injection.

  • Over 500 kids died of covid infections per year through 2023, over 90% of whom were unvaccinated. This is more than the number of kids who die of either brain cancer or leukemia each year. If we round the number of children who died of covid down to zero -are we willing to do the same for the most common types of non-survivable cancer as well?

  • While the children who died of covid were more likely to have underlying conditions, these at-risk children are less likely to become sickened in a population of vaccinated children who are their friends and classmates.

  • Most countries have not paused pediatric vaccination. Canada (until they join the US), Israel (who cannot be criticized by executive order), Germany, France, China, Australia, etc… all continue to vaccinate their kids against covid. What your neighbors are doing is not even a scientific argument.

  • The vaccine is proven safe. In a study of over 16 million doses, only 4 pediatric deaths were recorded, and none were attributable to being vaccinated. The vaccine related myocarditis that is more common in adolescent males is less common and less severe than infection-mediated myocarditis, as the former almost universally goes on to recover fully, while the latter does not.

NIH director Dr. Bhattacharya concluded: "It's common sense and it's good science."

Dr. Battacharya is a physician who does not -and cannot- practice medicine. He has never done a residency in any field of medicine or surgery. Placing someone of such low clinical standing -well below the level of the newest intern, in charge of the NIH predictably yields inappropriate and anti-intellectual clinical arguments. If a physician makes a decision that harms a patient and goes against established best practice, they cannot brush off liability by saying that it was just “common sense,” because that is as irrational as it is indefensible.

To be clear, common sense is not science, and it is often dangerous. Common sense tells you that:

  • the earth is flat

  • being out in the cold gives you a cold

  • lightning never strikes the same place twice

  • chicken soup is good for you when you are ailing from decompensated heart failure

  • submarines operated via gaming controllers are perfectly fit for deep sea adventures (to be fair, that is only common sense to billionaires).

There are thousands of other examples of how perception fools us in the absence of understanding the sometimes counterintuitive underpinnings of reality. Appealing to common sense as the only rebuttal to methodologically verified clinical studies, meta analyses, and perpetual surveillance efforts -is an anathema to scientists and serious clinicians, and yet it is shamelessly offered by this trio of science denialism.

ChatGPT zoomed out from the original video, revealing that these gentleman’s pants were on fire from the magnitude of the dishonesty being shared. The video cropping may have saved them from substantial embarrassment, but the leg and perineal burns will last a lifetime. Recall that RFK Jr.’s own MAHA report was written almost exclusively by ChatGPT, so this image is just as firmly grounded in facts and reality as that.

So what does American scientific dishonesty have to do with German grifters?

In 2021, an enterprising yet ethically-challenged 60 year-old German man sought to leverage the ignorance of those who were feared vaccination. You could pay him to pretend to be you; he would go to a clinic, get his shot, collect a stamp proving that a legitimate batch number was administered, and return the stamped card to you so that you could comply with any vaccine mandates that might vex you.

He did this OVER 200 TIMES in the course of about two years.

All that scary mRNA that RFK Jr. and other roofers warn can kill you with a single shot. Surely this guy is dead, right? Just a mound of clots and runaway nucleic acids?

Nope.

Follow-up studies on this innovative entrepreneur prove that he is alive and well, despite the litany of easily disproved social media posts claiming that covid vaccines will do anything from alter one’s DNA to bringing about sudden death. One would think that if 2 or 3 shots could kill you, that 217 would bring about a cataclysmic de-evolution into a mudskipping lungfish followed by a moist, implosive death.

But it didn’t.

He exhibited remarkably elevated anti-SARS-CoV-2 antibody titers, persistent spike-specific IgG, and unusually high neutralizing capacity against multiple variants. Even his saliva had antibodies at over 10 times the concentration of anyone in the control group.

For those anti-vaxxers who demand that sterilizing immunity is the only measure of vaccine success, you are only 213 to 217 shots away from achieving it!

His lab values showed mildly elevated liver enzymes (which could be related to weird vaccine behavior, or completely normal German interest in beer), transient increases in C-reactive protein, and a modestly increased D-dimer -but no clinically significant renal or hematologic abnormalities.

Clutches pearls: “But what about his HEART??”

He had no abnormalities in cardiac biomarkers such as troponin or NT-proBNP, and no evidence of myocarditis or pericarditis on serial testing. This strongly suggests that the rare cardiac complications of vaccination are not dose-dependent (because this guy really TRIED), but rather related to some other circumstance of genetics or co-infection (more research is needed on that, but it won’t be done in the US because such research is now banned by champions of free speech and gold-standard science).

So should we get a shit-ton of vaccinations if we are really worried about covid?

Please don’t.

I am NOT saying that what the Teutonic vaccine-mercenary did was good (because frankly, it was hilariously stupid), but I am saying that his poor decision-making presented a fascinating case study in how extraordinarily safe covid vaccines really are.

217 doses in 2 years is the equivalent of getting your primary series plus a booster, well over 70 times. This ridiculous case alone refutes all of the absurd claims of RFK Jr. and his verifiably baseless handwringing over safety. But let’s talk more about toxicity.

Saint Maximus Vaccinus of Magdeburg, the patron saint of sterilizing immunity. Stained glass ca. 2023.

What would it mean to take 70 times the recommended dose of some other common substances in your life?

Tylenol is in almost every medicine cabinet, but 10 times the recommended dose will kill most people.

Ibuprofen is also lethal at around 10 times the normal dose. So those are more toxic than covid vaccines.

Consuming more than 700–1000 mL (3–4 times a normal serving) of milk per day can result in significant toxicity in children, usually in the form of iron-deficiency anemia. Practicality would prevent anyone from consuming 70 times a normal milk serving -I mean, who has 6 gallons of milk in the fridge at one time?

Botulinum toxin is 10 times more toxic by mass than polonium-210 (which mysteriously finds its way into many a Russian dissident as a totally random event), yet many people still feel safe injecting it directly into their face -usually while telling you with a perfectly flaccid forehead that they would never inject toxins into their own children. The maximum dose of botox is 100 units, and 6 times that can potentially kill you, so it’s safe to conclude that 70 times that will absolutely kill you.

Water is essential for life, and we should drink 2-3 liters of it per day -but if you manage to drink only 3 times that amount, there are ample examples of it leading to death via water toxicity. So one can argue that mRNA covid vaccines are in fact much less likely to kill you than water (and I am even excluding drownings as a source of mortality).

If you inject or consume over 70 times the advised amount of almost anything, you will be 100% dead

Unless it’s a covid vaccine, apparently -but you still shouldn’t try that even though our European friend lives on despite his vaccine-binge. All he was left with was criminal fraud charges and an unmatched immunity to covid. At least the vaccine still did its job -unlike the three men in the HHS video.

Speaking of doing their job, I want to sincerely commend the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) and the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG) for having the knowledge, the integrity, and (ironically in the case of societies that exist to support the medical needs of children and women) the testicular fortitude to publish their own evidence-based apolitical vaccination guidelines for the good of their patients. This is the first time that medical societies have not been in parity with the CDC, and it is for good reason: the CDC is openly making medical recommendations that run counter to independently studied and verified facts, for shameful ideological gain.

Kennedy’s response to this disagreement was to threaten the physicians who (unlike him) bear the ultimate responsibility for their patient’s health. He accused pediatricians of disagreeing with him for financial gain… you know, the same pediatricians who are historically the lowest paid medical specialty, and who administer vaccines at a net financial loss because its the right thing to do. RFK Jr. is incredibly consistent when it comes to being wrong on the things he is passionate about.

The next time someone tells you that getting vaccinated against covid19 is dangerous, remember that as of yet -no one has ever able to overdose on it.

And enjoy this excellent chart on toxicity. It would make Paracelsus proud.

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